Give me feedback.

I have been writing for Craccum regularly for ages (back to the days of Colin) and I become increasingly cynical when I talk to people in shads and they say "oh I loved your column on _______ because ______" or "I hated _______ because you're an insufferable egotistical twat and I want to punch you in the face but you're a bit bigger than I thought you'd be and not quite as arab" Yet no-one takes the time to email me unless they represent some militant group of dickholes like the libertarianz or something.

This year I have done the amorphous thing cartoons, a couple of columns, and will be doing (hopefully) a weekly "Bishop Brian" cartoon because Brian Tamaki is my idol and I love him.

I'll write more stuff as I find the time, but in the meantime,

GIVE ME FEEDBACK YOU APATHETIC PACK OF MINGES.


Thank you kindly,

Happy Ahmed.



Oh. Am I allowed to abuse people relentlessly on here? I can't be fucked reading the rules and regs.

Only if they give you permission.

Yeah Ive read your stuff since the days of Colin, I thought Colins year was awesome, no one else did.

We're going to do a Photshop on Brian Tamaki, hope you dont mind us messing with your idol

Today was the first time I read your column and I was impressed and I am hard to impress.

I loved your part about short skirts and about writing about stuff you don't really care about.

I must check last week's craccum to see the comments hassling your column.

What, you mean we just can't wear a short skirt to impress you?

Damn. My plan is ruined!

Fuck I have to do another photoshop of Brian.
I have a good idea, but it's hard to photoshop him injecting himself with stem cells.

Sure you can :)

Does that mean youll join our photoshop comps?

Noticed the little 'Bishop Brian Says:' photoshops in the last couple of issues? Those are me. I can enter them if you like, but they are also being published. I have high res versions which I can post though.

Yeha I did notice those

good job, yea when we eventually do the "Fun with Brian Tamaki" photshop youre welcome to enter them.

I am seriously going to hell for the column I am writing right now.

I enjoyed this weeks column :clap:

I enjoyed it also........ The thing that threw me though is the guy i was sitting next to in my lecture (while i was reading "happy ahmed") his name was Ahmed........ coincidence? i think not.........

I'm fairly sure I don't look like anyone named Ahmed.


At any rate, good. This week's column was a bit of a new direction. The next one is completely different to anything i've written before.

I'm loving it.

Ahmed your eye is starting to creep me out........ i feel its watching me!

Yeha I liked the style, you should rip of Honest Colin and bring back the footnotes :D

Cant be as bad as this

http://durrrrr.blogspot.com/

I've seen that one before.

I don't know that the Pope is too happy with me right now.

Right.

There is some seriously good stuff coming up next week. I'm riding a wave of righteousness.

Also I am going to hell. For all eternity.
So are Alec and Stian.

woot! craccum this week was a bit dry. I want that info bar on the top of the page brought back. I carry the 4 past issues of craccum in my bag. Yes i have no life ;)

No tits n arse in this issue !!! :@
But thankfully no naked guys either....

Happy ahmed column looks pretty cool.... I'll get around to read it properly when i have time...

Give me feedback you fuckers.


No-one emails me anymore.

Ahmed i see what you ment last week when you said you were going to hell for writting that piece......... but it was what i needed in my biochem lecture today....... it gave me a good laugh......... Keep up the good work!

mmmmmmmmm foetuses

I dont think it would have been possible to have made then more politicially incorrect :clap:

Right.
The theme for the next issue is "discovering the New Zealand dream."


I'm completely fucked for ideas. THINK OF STUFF FOR ME TO WRITE ABOUT.

I'm nowhere near drunk enough.

Do an inside scoop on homosexuality within rugby locker rooms.

Do one on how much girls suck. Because they do. And as a female I'll freely admit that.

I think I spent most of my first year writing doing that.


I'm currently leaning towards writing about how any New Zealander that is famous for doing anything great was either drunk or trying to get drunk and did it by accident.

Haha. You better be including Charlotte Dawson in this...

And Nikki Watson. Media whores from 'Nam.

Charlotte Dawson is only famous for being drunk.

Excellent. Maybe Charlotte Dawson and Nikki Watson doing drunken debaucherous sexual favours for each other.

Bet that'd go down a treat...

...this is Craccum not fucking Woman's Day.

...They have that in Women's Day? Wow, Ahmed, you're more in-the-know than I gave you credit for.

Or do you consider it field research?

...er....

Shit.

Um...

I read it at the fish'n'chip shop. While drinking Lion red.

Just after I beat my wife.

:D

no you accidently mistook it for a porno, that sounds more credible

:hilarious:

hey its not that hard to do!

I'd be worried if any of you guys got caught jerking off to the Woman's Day...

:naughty: